The fear of losing her for eternity, made me adhere to my stupid hope. I had a word with her three years before. Her beauty and cheerfulness were the traits that drove everybody crazy and her witty smiles, enveloped gestures and calmness made me her captive. Her love was all that I remembered and her love was all that I needed to survive. The pain of captivation was far soothing than the joys of freedom. Her bond gave a meaning to my existence and her love was all that could pump the blood in my veins. She was the one who injected the wine of love into my veins for the first time and afterward; I got addicted.
I was now a captive and she was my master. She ruled me with no words but her smiles and eyes communed all what she needed and what she wanted. There was a life for me in shear obedience perhaps this was my life that I chose. After much trial, she accepted me and showed me the path to one of the gates of her heart. I entered her heart like a Victorian; I was served the drinks and hospitality that was beyond my expectations. But sooner I entered into the streets of my new kingdom and I found that everyone there was dressed and treated like a king. My heart grew heavy and pounded hard. I went to the servant serving the drinks and asked her about the strangeness of this kingdom. She replied; 'my lord! This is a kingdom of heaven, here all are equal and all are served.'
The sadness grew like fungus in my heart but I closed my eyes and pretended as if I was the only king.
Then one day she came to me and said; "Come here my lord, for you need a little rest and a little warmth."
She came as close to me as if she intended to breath in my breathe. She was really a meditator. The closeness of her was closeness of life in me. Her caressing hands and caring whisper lifted me to the Heaven I had dreamed about. She flew like a dove with pinion soar. It seemed as if even wind was in love with her, for he was letting her float without endeavor, while the sun has turned a bit cold and a bit jealous of wind who had hugged up the gorgeous dove. Then the day started retiring and we came down swiftly on earth. Then after she said; "Forgive me my lord! I need to leave." I couldn't speak a word but she knew that she can never be rejected so she went away.
Life was wise without her but now it was only beautiful. The memories of her, was fuel for my life; which was now dedicated to her. Several days passed away but the desire of seeing her kept kindling in me. I could see others, dressed like me, waiting for their turn to be entertained. Though the desire of possessiveness was strong in me but the fear of losing her restrained me, so I kept my eyes closed and pretended again.
After limitless endeavors to calm my heart, I failed to suppress the desire of loving her, the desire to forgo my existence in her bond and the desire to transform my physical stature in a breeze of love kept haunting me. So I wrote to her, "I took a loan from your time, so deductions from my breathe I must give, to compensate the loan. But my love, if someday while sleeping I breath in even if your part, then please forgive me and I know and believe that you are too generous. A life I had but I exchanged it with the memories of yours. So hold me for I have turned fragile."
Then after long uninterrupted days of silence and nights that waited for a reply, I received her words incorporated with her blood; "oh my dear though your passion seems pure, but as the duty of sun is to shine every home and warm every soul, I must deliver my love to all for if I converged to one, he may not sustain the heat as one can not sustain sun converging on him. So be not my captive, but an admirer who would come in the bar to drink a bit, dance a bit and move away with a fine ecstasy of being lost; away from the wilderness of world into the valley of beauty and peace. My dear, dream me not for I am unattainable. I am like wind that touches all and can never be possessed by one. So strive to break away the chains of love and live as you lived. Love is treacherous and so shall you be sentenced for capital punishment for you committed it. You are sentenced for freedom. Now, you may go to any valley or plain but my womb shall not bear your child. So go away for my rules are stern and unchangeable."
Her words were like spears unto my heart but the ink of her letter revealed me the pain she suffered while sentencing me. Surely she was not to be blamed but her wit and rules. I was sentenced for freedom but still I would wait for her, for I can not imagine a world that exists without her. A kingdom she has; ruled by hundred kings and a king I am, ruling kingdom of nothingness. The zenith of pain and loneliness was hard on my heart and the hope that she will return someday or at least accept me as a captive is longing since ever. So I wandered all around her kingdom and in shear blaze of rebellion I aware people about the strange customs of her kingdom but they instead of hating her, became more interested.
My heart was humble for it knew where it has led me, so it said; "Oh my master, I loved her like life but she deserved more, so forgive me for the fear of LOSING her for eternity, makes me adhere to my stupid hope."
Then after world conspired and whispered in my ears that the essence of feelings does not revolve around the beauty of body or soul but, it stands upon the beauty of your own thought and perception. So I tried to invade another time with no hope of finding the wells of refreshing life but I proved a proud Victorian. From that day onward, I could not calm my passion and lust of invasions, swallowing every kingdom that stood before me. But still I feel, her hospitality was warmer than the heat of victory. Whereas my ego soothes me by saying; "True, her kingdom was great; torn between a hundred kings and a king you are; drinking the wine of hundred
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